How am I ????  Well, no nausea, some hair, taste back and gaining weight, 70% energy back, kids happy, husband has brought in enough money too pay mortgage for January, I have incredible friends and a Grace filled, Loving, Holy God - guess I’m blessed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I could go for a little break from the pin sensation in hands and feet - and a little more balance so I didn’t need a walker - but I don’t want to be selfish - I’m learning how to do things with what I have or ask for help Seriously, I am great!! I even had a $107 MK order yesterday.

LIFE IS GOOD!

Why is having faith so hard for us? Is it because we don’t “see” God.  Is it because we have faith in our family, friends, church family and they let us down (we forgetting that they are human beings)? Is it because we have such an ego that we think we can do it better, plan it better, execute it better than anyone else so having Faith in someone else - like a God - is not necessary?

We want to have the privileges of faith.  We want that feeling of security, the belief that some spiritual being loves us more than His life literally, that in this messed up world we can find that deep inner peace and joy, and we of course want to be entitled to a God’s strength, wisdom, and powers.

So, how do we let go, believe, and have real faith.  It’s a leap.  It’s an unknown leap that someday you just have to take. It’s the total surrender of “it’s not working for me without you so I’m going in with both feet”.  The world is full of pain, sorrow, sickness (boy I know that one).  Sometimes, the dark times is where we are willing to take that leap.  We have to get to the point - because of our pride and ego - that we can’t make it better so we turn to God.  That’s ok! Oh it’s great if you are able to take that life changing leap at any time but if you can’t - the next time life isn’t so perfect - leap for faith and “try it on”. You won’t be disappointed.

Let me show you what faith can look like….

Right now because of my teaching classes being cut way back, I have $2.30 cents to my name. I have no checking account with a balance, no savings with a hidden balance, no 401K or pension plan.  I have $2.30 to my name. Through careful planning and some generous hearts my January bills are paid - so no fret!  Yesterday though, Zavier and I wanted either pancakes or scrambled eggs for breakfast.  We had no eggs. Since I only had my $2.30 I didn’t want to use it on eggs.  We have plenty of other food in the house - we are far from starvation. However, once something is in your mind - like we want eggs - you have that thought for a while.  It’s not going away.

I have total faith that GOD WILL TAKE CARE OF US! That doesn’t always mean we get what we want (like eggs) but we will eat.  I do believe that my heavenly Daddy loves to make us happy - so sometimes we get the wants as well as the needs.

Only 30 minutes after Zavier and I began craving eggs just because we didn’t have them, I got a letter and a check from my dear friend Kari.  I knew she had owed me some money for a discontinued Mary Kay product I found for her.  To my surprise, the check was for that amount plus she added $15 finder’s fee - because that’s Kari - a HUGE HEART!

It pays to have faith.  Zav and I got our eggs plus, chili, tomato sauce, cereal, beans, clorox wipes, green beans and more.

Please, LET GO and take that step of FAITH.  Scary - yes! Worth it, YES!!!! God loves you and wants the best for you.  You’ll still have trails and lessons but He walks them with you! You don’t have to live with worries or be scared - even if you only have $2.30.  God is your Savior, Grace, Provider, Strength, Love, Compassion, Shepherd and the list goes on and on and on.  Look what you gain for just a “leap of faith”.

2Co 5:7  It’s what we trust in but don’t yet see that keeps us going.

My hands are even worse today. I don’t feel the keyboard keys much so I keep typing the wrong letters. My muscles feel like they are twisted rubber bands. It’s not fun.

So, I lean to God for what “I THINK” I need - a little of His grace, a sprinkle of His compassion, a pinch of His strenght etc.

In my devotions today - this verse hit me hard.  I should not take just want I think I need (assuming I can handle the rest), but I should take ALL that God has to offer me.  I think sometimes I don’t because I don’t want to “burden” Him - or “take too much”.  We CAN’T!  He is our loving Daddy and He wants to give IT ALL to us!  SO TAKE IT!

Eph 6:13  Be prepared. You’re up against far more than you can handle on your own. Take all the help you can get, every weapon God has issued, so that when it’s all over, but the shouting, you’ll still be on your feet.